The Funny Thing About Cleveland

Many many years ago My Aunt and Uncle decided to take my cousins; Patrick, Thomas, and Noel (I don’t remember if Rose was born yet but if she was she was going too) to Disneyland.  But they decided to keep it a surprise.  They told the kids that they were going to visit Noodle and Grampian and us but that was it.

On the drive down my Aunt said to my Uncle something along the lines of, “Don’t you think that part of the fun of a trip is the anticipation?”  He agreed so she said to her kids, “Would you guys rather go to Cleveland or to Disneyland?”

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The Funny Thing About Vet Bills

Vet bills come in droves.  Everyone who has worked with animals knows this.

Recently Booge, our Boston Terrier, woke up one day having gone completely deaf over night and having no sense of equilibrium at all.  This was a Saturday and since he showed no improvement by Monday we took him to the vet.  I suspected an inner ear infection, but they couldn’t see one.  Thy said this kind of thing happens to old dogs sometimes, which is funny because until recently he was our “young” dog.  Anyway it has sense cleared up and he’s back to normal.


Sleeping in the son dreaming of vet bills.

Shortly after that Dempsey stopped eating.  This wasn’t shocking, he hadn’t been a great eater ever since we got him and we may have been overwhelming him with food…  OR he ate the yoga mat we put in the bottom of his crate.  It was one of those.  My initial thought was yoga mat, but then he kept pooping and his stomach didn’t seem hot or dissented and he maintained his puppy like attitude.  So then I thought maybe he was just sick of food.  So we switched his food.  He wolfed it down and spent the next few hours vomiting.

Clearly all was not well. He went to the vet and they discovered that he had indeed eaten the yoga mat.  Not all of it, but quite a bit of it.  The good news was that none of it had moved to his intestines.  When we picked him up the next day we also got this picture:

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The pile was actually bigger than that but you get the point.  The poor guy had about 30 staples in his stomach and was forbidden from playing or getting them wet or having any fun at all, for two weeks.  He just got them out and is much happier and has put on about 15lbs since the incident.

Hope you leave here laughing,


The Funny Thing About Rope Swings

I was once an annoying child who saw that my neighbor had something fun and decided that I was entitled to it.  In this case my neighbors had a rope swing that went out over a steep hill creating a 20(ish) foot drop when the swing was at it’s highest.  We got permission to use it once and then used it all the time, when the owners weren’t home.  Anyway one day my parents were watching Colleen and I on this swing and the inevitable happened.  I missed the seat and was hanging on by only my hands.  I was four or five at this point and didn’t really have the arm strength to pull myself up, or to hold on.  I tried though and my arms gave out right at the crest of the swing.

In the ensuing fall it occurred to me that I might die.  I didn’t really understand what that meant but I was pretty sure that’s what was going to happen.  Then, WHUMP! I hit the dirt about as close to the neighbor’s burn pile as I could with out landing in it.  I got the wind knocked out of me and a bloody nose.  That’s all.

My parents, who didn’t yet know the extent of my injuries were reacting very differently.  My mom had jumped up and was racing over in a panic.  My dad, who had seen me go up above our roof hanging on the swing, then come crashing back down followed by a huge cloud of dust; was doubled over laughing. It’s a problem he has where when people seem to be terribly hurt he cracks up. This wasn’t a one time thing, it happens quite a bit.

I was a bit sore the next day but other than that I was completely fine.

I hope you leave here laughing.